Chemo - (Round 4 - weeks 10-12 of 12)

Week 10 Chemo March 10, 2016 - I can't believe we are at week 10 which begins the last round of this part of treatment.  This is going to be the last time I get not only my normal "Pre-Chemo meds" but then the "Big Chemo Cocktail" with Perjeta, Herceptin and Taxol which is what I get the first week of each "new round".  I can't believe it!  Scott came with me and my dear friend Patti came to visit!  During the treatment, I felt my "new" usual all over body bloating, everything was swollen - UGH!  I don't really care for this feeling at ALL!  As the week went by, the Hot & Cold flashes continued and so did the hair loss.  My little pixie cut is quickly thinning out.  At the hospital my doctor and all the nurses are just absolutely amazed that I still have hair.  I jokingly say "it's my Greek Goddess genes!" LOL!!!  They all laugh at & with me!  Hey - we have to keep the humor going otherwise there would be way too many tears!

Week 11 Chemo March 17, 2016 - Happy St. Patrick's Day!  I had to wear my greens today to my chemo treatment - maybe it will bring me some Leprechaun Luck!  I'll take any luck I can get ~ LOL!  All looked good for treatment.  I was plugged into my meds ready for the Taxol!  I felt the normal bloating and swelling - I'm getting used to it now, but still doesn't make it any better.  I also had to do a follow up Transvaginal Ultrasound at my OBGYN's office.  All went well.  The results came back and thank goodness, the 5 cm cyst had disseminated all by itself!  Thank You GOD!  Now that's some GREAT news!!! 

Week 12 Chemo March 24, 2016 - Week 12!  WOW - how can that be? Phase one of my treatment plan has come to an end today, I can't believe it!  My good friend Patty came to visit today again!  She brought beautiful Calla Lily's - so sweet! 

It's a bittersweet day. Part of me is very excited because I've made it thru this part of treatment and these 12 weeks (although emotionally and physically different), I still made it!  The other part of me is really nervous about what's to come... surgery, more chemo (the type that will knock me to the core from what they say, radiation and more surgery)!!  While others will be enjoying their lives, living life and planning summer vacations, making memories etc, my reality is very different.  My reality is about survival, there is no other option for anything other than that.   Basically, 2016 is about letting go of what was and creating what can be for years to come.  So, in the scheme of things, 1 year of going thru hell for a potential many years down the road is an excellent trade off.  I remember saying to my breast surgeon in the very beginning, "give it to me straight, I need 20 years, can you get me at least 20 years of life with all things being considered with no sugar coating"?  She responded, "in giving it to you straight... no one can predict how long someone will live, we can walk outside tomorrow and that be the end due to some fluke event or accident based on how life is today.  In relation to your cancer diagnosis and all things being considered, we can get 20 years, but the next year will be hell and it will suck, so prepare yourself""  I LOVE her!  I don't need fluff, I need reality and that's what she gave me! 

Now fast forward 12 weeks.... End of Phase 1 of Treatment.  I was anxious to see Dr. Browne because I wanted to hear what she has to say about the original tumor.  I vividly remember what the original tumor felt like because I was the one that found / felt it.  When I checked myself this morning, it definitely felt smaller than it did when I was diagnosed back in Dec 2015, but it's still there, I still feel it's presence which scares me.  So, my question is, what have these past 12 weeks of chemo and targeted treatments really done on in the inside if I can still feel it, just smaller?  Dr. Browne  and I talked for a while.  After she examined me, she said that ideally we like to feel no evidence of the tumor.  She could still feel mine ~ NOT GOOD!  She went on to say that it has shrunk and it feels as if it is half the size ~ THIS IS GOOD!  She ordered another MRI to be done some time next week, so that we can see what we're looking at.  I'm anxiously going to be waiting for these results to get a baseline as to where I stand internally and get the pathology on the tumor from the MRI!  She also wants me to come back next week for Herceptin only which is one of the targeted treatments.  Honestly, I don't mind as it is another day where they can monitor me and we can talk about the MRI results.  I have to say, I'm worried.  I feel like although the tumor has shrunk in half, it's not enough.  I'm nervous, I'm worried, I'm scared yet again!

Phase 1 of treatment.... DONE!!!

Let's hope it did enough to battle this beast of a tumor!!!

Fabulously Fighting ~ Pink Carpet Event

Fighting Fabulously

Pink Carpet Event

February 28th, 2016 at Bravo Boutique, Concord, NH

My husband nominated me to be considered for Fighting Fabulously's Pink Carpet Event at Bravo Boutique. I was so honored to have been selected! These 2 amazing women who started Fighting Fabulously who are both cancer fighters themselves, brought a day of pampering and excitement with so much selfless love & joy to the 5 women chosen, all who are either battling breast cancer or are survivors. It was the first time since being diagnosed in Dec that I felt like my old self and had a sense of normal. Thank you Shanna Clarke-Pinet and Mary Morin Carlin for all that you do and for making me smile & feel so special. Special thanks to Governor Maggie Hassan who also came to show her support! I will forever remember this precious day as I shared it with amazing women, my wonderful husband & beautiful girls!

Chemo (Round 3 - weeks 7-9 of 12)

Week 7 Chemo Feb 18, 2016 - Going into week 7 I felt a bit worried as today was going to be not only my normal "Pre-Chemo meds" but then the "Big Chemo Cocktail" with Perjeta, Herceptin and Taxol which is what I get the first week of each "new round".  Scott came with me and my dear friend Patti came to visit!  During the treatment, I felt sooo bloated, everything was swollen - UGH!  Honestly I thought I was going to blow up and explode!  By nighttime, I had the worst heartburn yet!  Thank God for Prilosec!  As the week went by, I also got a swift hit of the Hot & Cold flashes.  Holy Moly!  It hits me at night and one minute I'm hot, then sweating my but off then the next minute I'm freezing!  This isn't a fun thing at any point in time, especially not fun when you are sleep deprived!  I also developed a bit of a cold, mostly the sniffles, but hanging in there as I keep trying to get used to this new hairdo!

Week 8 Chemo Feb 25, 2016 - This week was going to be a very SPECIAL week because it was going to be the first time my girls come to treatment with me!  They are on Feb school vacation and they kept asking to come - this was the "right" time for them.  Evmorfia is a  Girl Scout and she made the decision to work on her Silver Award by focusing on Breast Cancer.  She had this great idea to view it from the perspective of a teenager living with a parent with cancer.  There aren't many resources out there from this point of view and she felt she could have some impact.  Her goal is to document my journey, put it to video, publish it and ultimately make it a resource for the hospital for teenagers.  She also wants to be able to provide the Oncology something that all cancer patients can use while they are getting treatment. She's not sure what that will be yet, but she has such a great plan and of course her little sister Sophia wants in on it too!  Today will also be a productive day as she'll actually be meeting with the hospital & nurse staff to talk thru it!  I've very proud that she wants to do this.  I can't wait to see her final product.  I hope it makes an impact! 

Treatment was just normal chemo today (Taxol).  Felt bloated and swollen during treatment.  Dr. Browne (pictured below) said all looked good and to continue doing what I'm doing.  I also met with the Radiation Oncologist today - Dr. Zhoe.  We discussed many things related to when I get surgery and also when I start radiation.  So much to consider with each step.  With all this information, I'm happy to say I've made the final decision on surgery and it's scheduled!! 

During this week, I also was part of the "Fighting Fabulously" Pink Carpet Event.  There will a separate blog entry on that one as it was "FABULOUS" and deserves it's own entry! 

Week 9 Chemo March 3, 2016 - I felt pretty good going into week 9.  My good friend Patti stopped by today!  Overall ok, the only thing that has been declining is my sleep.  For the past 2 weeks I have been averaging 4 hours of sleep a night!  It's torture!  I fall asleep like a baby and then BAMM.... 1:30am every night I wake up and just linger on.  I brought it to Dr. Browne's attention and she decided to lower my Dex from 10 mg to 8mg which may make a difference.  she also suggested to take Tylenol PM.  I did try the Tylenol PM on Friday and Saturday night and ohhhhhhhhhh.... what a beautiful thing...SLEEP!  I forgot what it was like to get a good nights sleep!   This brings us to the end of Round 3!  It isn't pretty, but I'm here, still alive and kickin' - trying to beat this cancer thing!  Take that Cancer.... BAMM!